Some of the culture shock which afflicts foreign visitors to
China comes from false expectations, engendered through travel in
other parts of Asia. The Chinese are not a "mellow" people.
Profoundly irreligious, they are neither particularly spiritual nor
gentle, nor are they deferential to strangers. However, the
irritations sometimes experienced by foreigners - the sniggers and
the unhelpful service - can almost invariably be put down to
nervousness and the formidable language barrier, rather than
hostility. This is not to say that at some time in your trip you
will not lock yourself in your hotel room and wish never to see a
Chinese face again - you probably will. But however abused you may
feel, remember that foreigners are still treated far better in
China than are the Chinese themselves. Indeed, communication
between foreigners and locals is never a problem once you get
beyond the language barrier. Visitors who speak Chinese will
encounter an endless series of delighted and amazed interlocutors
wherever they go, invariably asking about their age and marital
status before anything else.
Even if you don't speak Chinese, you will run into enough locals
eager to practise their English. If from such encounters you are
subsequently invited to someone's home, a gift might well be
expected, though people will not open it in front of you, nor will
they express profuse gratitude for it. The Chinese way to express
gratitude is through reciprocal actions rather than words. Indeed,
elaborate protestations of thanks can be taken as an attempt to
avoid obligation. If you are lucky enough to be asked out to a
restaurant, you will discover that restaurant bills are not
shared out between the guests but instead people will go to great
lengths to claim the honour of paying the whole bill by themselves.
Normally that honour will fall to the person perceived as the most
senior, and as a foreigner dining with Chinese you should make some
effort to stake your claim, though it is probable that someone else
will grab the bill before you do. Attempting to pay a "share" of
the bill may cause serious embarrassment.
Perhaps surprisingly, in view of the above, the main gripe of
foreign travellers in China is the relentless and very widespread
determination that foreigners should be overcharged at every
opportunity. For the traveller this can become wearying and
alienating. But for your own equanimity you would do well to accept
overcharging to a certain degree rather than fight for your rights
all across China. The sums you will be arguing about are often
trivial ones. And remember that the average rickshaw driver would
consider it a humiliating defeat to carry a foreigner for the same
price as a local. Try to inflict that on him and you will stir up
real bitterness.
Another factor that Western tourists need to note is that the
Chinese have almost no concept of privacy . People will
stare at each other from point-blank range and pluck letters or
books out of others' hands for close inspection. Even toilets are
built with partitions so low that you can chat with your neighbour
while squatting. All leisure activities including visits to natural
beauty spots or holy relics are done in large noisy groups and the
desire of some Western tourists to be "left alone" is variously
interpreted by locals as eccentric, arrogant or even sinister.
In a land where privacy is an unheard-of luxury, exotic
foreigners inevitably become targets for blatant curiosity ,
particularly in rural areas. You may at times find people running
up and jostling for a better look, exclaiming loudly to each other,
Lao Wai, Lao Wai (literally, "old outside person").
This is not intended to be aggressive or insulting though it can
give foreigners the uncomfortable feeling of being a zoo animal.
One way to render yourself human again is to address the onlookers
in Chinese, if you can. Otherwise, perhaps you should just be
grateful that people are showing an interest in you.
Apart from staring, various other forms of behaviour perceived
as anti-social in the West are considered perfectly normal in China
and foreign tourists should bear this in mind before passing
judgement. Take the widespread habit of spitting , for
example, which can be observed in buses, trains, restaurants and
even inside people's homes. Outside the company of urban
sophisticates, it would not occur to people that there was anything
disrespectful in delivering a powerful spit while in conversation
with a stranger. Smoking , likewise, is almost universal
among men and in the few places where non-smoking signs have been
posted (for example, in soft-seat train compartments) the signs are
rarely observed and any attempt to stop others from lighting up is
met with incomprehension. As in many countries, handing out
cigarettes is a basic way of establishing goodwill and non-smokers
should be apologetic about turning down offered cigarettes.
Although China would not normally be described as a liberal
country, these days restraints on public behaviour are disappearing
remarkably fast. Skimpy clothing in summer is quite normal
in all urban areas, particularly among women (less so in the
countryside), and even in potentially sensitive Muslim areas, such
as the far west, many Han Chinese girls insist on wearing
miniskirts and see-through blouses. Although Chinese men commonly
wear short trousers and expose their midriffs in hot weather,
Western men who do the same should note that the bizarre sight of
hairy flesh in public - chest or legs - will instantly become the
focus of giggly gossip. The generally relaxed approach to clothing
applies equally when visiting temples, though in mosques men
and women alike should cover their bodies above the wrists and
ankles. As for beachwear , bikinis and briefs are in, but
nudity has yet to make its debut.
Skimpy clothing is one thing, but scruffy clothing is
quite another. If you want to earn the respect of the Chinese -
useful for things like getting served in a restaurant or checking
into a hotel - you need to make some effort with your appearance.
While the average Chinese peasant might reasonably be expected to
have wild hair and wear dirty clothes, for a rich foreigner to do
so is likely to arouse a degree of contempt. Another good way to
ease your progress is to have a name or business card to flash
around - even better if you can include your name in Chinese
characters on it.
Hand-shaking is not a Chinese tradition, though it is
now fairly common between men. Bodily contact in the form of
embraces or back-slapping can be observed between same-sex friends,
and these days, in cities, a boy and a girl can walk round
arm-in-arm and even kiss without raising an eyebrow. Voice
level in China seems to be pitched several decibels louder than
in most other countries, though this should not necessarily be
interpreted as a sign of belligerence.